Self-care is good for our dogs too

Julie van Schie Author

Good self-care isn't selfish it's essential. We can be the best companions and guardians for our dogs if we're well and happy.

Numb

I opened my computer and gazed at the screen as it flashed brightly to life. The thought of working made my head thump.

I stared blankly at my new website. I’d spent money on an all-in-one platform. I could write my blog, send emails, run courses and a community all from the one site, I should be excited, but I felt numb.

The numbness wasn’t just around my work. I was constantly tired and irritable; I never felt well and hadn’t enjoyed training my dogs for months. Something had to change; I needed time off to work out what.

Delighted!

It’s three months later and I feel like a different person. It was hard taking time away, but I’m so glad I did it. I’m happy, patient, motivated and best of all I’m loving teaching my dogs again.

Self-care is not a luxury

We’re our dogs’ companions; their friends, and family. We’re their guardians, their teachers, their physical and emotional support. They have no one else to rely on but us, so part of caring well for them must be caring well for ourselves.

While this may seem obvious, a lack of self-care has become endemic in our culture: work hard, be productive, don’t be lazy, sacrifice yourself for the betterment of others, push through the pain. This often comes with a niggly little voice that whispers in our ears: you’re not good enough, you don’t do enough, you should be better.

Humans have an amazing ability to adapt, it’s one of our greatest strengths, but sometimes this can work against us. The insidious thing about prolonged stress, is that our bodies continue to produce physiological responses which can lead to exhaustion, depression, and other serious health issues. A dog’s welfare is highly dependent on receiving exercise, connection, affection, and enrichment; an exhausted or sick human will find this difficult to give.

Having fun working on body awareness

Our dogs pick up our stress

Our stress can affect our dogs in ways you may not be aware of. A 2019 study investigated synchronization of long-term stress between dogs and their owners. The researchers studied 58 dog-human pairings and analysed their hair cortisol concentrations.

Cortisol is a stress hormone produced in response to the body’s need for efficiency during flight or fight scenarios. Its level can be accurately measured by the residue it leaves in the hair.

The results of the studies were compelling; dogs’ stress levels do mirror that of their human guardians. If we’re stressed it’s likely they are too.

What lights you up?

Looking after yourself is entirely an individual experience, we all have different things that light us up. If you're feeling numb or down like I was, my suggestion is to take some time to rest and explore what you enjoy. Give yourself a day or two or more if you can, and ask “what would I like to do now?” See what comes up, act on that and assess how it feels. Keep a journal of all the things small and large that make you smile and commit to doing more of them.

This goes for being with our dogs too; how do you love spending time together? A long, luscious belly rub, a vigorous game of catch me if you can, or learning a new dog sport?

I love walking with Merlin, he takes his time deeply investigating every smell. Watching him reminds me to slow down, quiet my busy brain, and notice the beautiful world around me. And training with Bonnie is such fun! Her connection, her thoughtfulness and pure enjoyment are truly infectious.

It’s a little scary how easily feelings of numbness and depression can creep up on us. Taking time away, giving ourselves permission to explore what we enjoy, can help us be happier humans and better companions to the dogs we love so much. It certainly did for me.

My sweet pals!

Special note

If your feelings are intense and/or persistent please seek the help of a qualified medical practitioner.

Help & Support for Depression: Black Dog Institute

How Can I Get Help for Depression? Healthline

Resources and References

Stress effects on the body, American Psychological Society 

The Impact of Stress on Body Function, NCBI: National Center for Biotechnology Information

What is General Adaptation Syndrome? Healthline

What is cortisol? Webmd

Hair cortisol analysis: An update on methodological considerations and clinical applications, National Library of Medicine

Long term stress levels are synchronized in dogs and their owners, Scientific Reports. Sundman, AS., Van Poucke, E., Svensson Holm, AC. et al. Long-term stress levels are synchronized in dogs and their owners. Sci Rep 9, 7391 (2019). https://doi.org/10.1038/s41598...

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